Image via Breanna Rose.
In my experience, being a 20something means learning to sift through a lot of BS. You will get fed plenty of lies from our culture, the media, and even your friends and family. The best way to combat these lies is to become self-aware, get to know yourself. If you know who you are, you can sift through the muck and only draw out what's valuable to you. To get you started here is a list of the Top 5 lies 20somethings tell ourselves.
1. I need to be with someone to be happy.
The lie of all lies for the 20somethings is that you're not someone until you're somebody's someone. This is just a bold-faced lie, and it's stopping you from reaching the full potential of you. Yes, you may be single, but it's time to quit acting like you're dying and get over it. The reason being single is so hard for so many of us is because it gets right to the heart of our insecurities, but the truth is you're not single because you're not __________ enough (see number 4). You're single because you just haven't met someone yet. If you're still not convinced read Thought Catalog's great article, Why You're Single.
2. I should be way further ahead in my career.
Should you really? Growing up in the "trophy generation" where everyone gets an award for participating has left many of us feeling that things are not moving fast enough for us. We've been trained to crave recognition, measuring our value by the number of likes we get on Facebook, retweets we receive on Twitter, and emails that fill our inbox. And so as we begin our "careers" at the very bottom of the rungs, we can't seem to understand why we haven't been promoted to CEO yet. In reality, you have to put in a lot of hard work before you start getting recognized for your efforts. So don't be discouraged, keep on doing you to the best of your abilities and someone will eventually
notice.
notice.
3. I need more stuff.
The truth is you don't. Stuff and status are the kryptonite of the modern-day 20something. More isn't really more, at least not in the sense we assume. More stuff doesn't mean more happiness, it means more debt, more anxiety, and more discontent. More often than not more is less, less space, less freedom, and less control. Living your life in the pursuit of owning more crap (excuse my French) is the quickest way to surefire unhappiness. If you're interested in living with less, check out The Minimalists.
4. I'm not _________ (insert insecurity) enough.
A million different things come to mind when looking at this blank. I'm not pretty enough, smart enough, rich enough, funny enough, unique enough, liked enough, etc. Truthfully, there will always be something to fill in that blank, and the sooner you start appreciating yourself for all that you already are, the sooner you can start living life with a Rhett Butler (Gone with the Wind) kind of attitude, "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn".
5. I should have my ish together by now.
It's time for a little perspective. Assuming you don't smoke and are not obese then your average life span will likely be somewhere in the mid to high 80s. Roughly translated this means we have only lived through one-fourth of our lives. 1/4th! If you had everything 100% together in your 20s then the next 60 years would be a big fat bore. Simply put we've got a long way to go, so it's okay that most days you don't have any clue what to do with your life. Remember, there's a lot of life left to live.
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Amen to all of the above!
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading Vicky! Glad someone feels the same!
DeleteAs someone whose friends are all seemingly soooo sorted (and even married) at 21/22 this is so refreshing!! Thank you :-)
ReplyDeleteGlad to be your solidarity sister! Thanks for reading, Lily!
Delete2 and 5, girl. Preach.
ReplyDeleteAmen!
DeleteI'm 26, but all of this resonates with me!!
ReplyDeleteI love that you put the references in parentheses. You rock, girl. Keep your head up.
ReplyDeleteShit Ashley, where have you been all my life? amazing points, so relatable!
ReplyDelete