Unabashedly

There are many reasons I love the movie Crazy.Stupid.Love, the main two being the insanely cute "I wish they were actually dating" couple featured above. Emma Stone isn't the girl you love to hate, she's the girl you wish was your best friend, in hopes that some of her uncanny, unrehearsed awesomness would rub off on you. And then there's Ryan Gosling. Oh Ryan, you must have made a deal with the devil, because I don't know a single person on this planet, male or female, who wouldn't marry you. Leave Eva.... ("I tweeted at you everyday for a year". Kidding, I didn't actually, but I would). 

Aside from the wonders that are Emma and Ryan, I love Crazy.Stupid.Love for its premise, be whatever you are to the fullest, even when it seems crazy and stupid. Real love, real emotions the kind that get you torn up in knots, acting like a wild person, and driving to your crush's house at 2 in the morning asking him to kiss you (true story, I did this) is unabashed, it feels no embarrassment. It is poised, disconcerted. 

After twenty-three years I've found that the quickest path to unhappiness is comparison and inauthenticity. 

Comparison is perhaps one of life's only constant companions. We compare everything- what we own, who we are, and how much we've achieved, only to find that comparison breeds nothing but jealousy. Teddy Roosevelt once said "comparison is the thief of joy", comparing yourself to others only fosters insecurity and inauthenticity. This is my next point, neatly wrapped up in what is perhaps the most cliched advice of all time, "be yourself". Yes I said it, be yourself. But you know what,  I'll see that cliche and raise you a quantifier.

Don't just be yourself. Be yourself, unabashedly. 

Here's what I mean: embrace every facet of you, the good, the bad, and the down right embarrassing. Inauthenticity can never lead to fulfillment, because even if you learn to be an incredible copy of someone else, you can never really get rid of the stuff that makes you, you. Do you love Battlestar Galactica? Love it, fully. Is your passion rock climbing? Embrace it. Is there nothing in the world that makes you happier than a cheesy rom-com? Girl, what's holding you back? 

The sooner you figure out who you are, the sooner you can get out of your own way and enjoy being you. Your 20s is the best time to do this, trust me. The miracle of being a 20something is that no one really expects you to have things together for a few years. This is the perfect time to mess up, try things out, and make a general fool of yourself. So get in, get gritty, figure out who you are while we're still young. Because you'll find real happiness has nothing to do with the things we chase- the jobs, the clothes, friends, and statuses. Happiness comes from resting content in the fact that you love who you are, no matter what anyone else wants you to be. So be you, and do it unabashedly.